How do I go on living knowing that I am a spawn of ?

It bothers me to my core that my parents are related . I am not sure on the details but they told me and my brothers that they (my parents) are cousins, close enough to be illegal. They are foreigners but that's no excuse., I just had to walk out of the room and cry. How could they be so gross and so stupid and so selfish to do this to us! It's like living in a mental prison knowing that you are a result of some sick and twisted relationship. I just want to die. Thank God I have no physical deformities but I have lots of emotional problems. Depression/anxiety and I look so much like my older brother its disgusting. I want to have plastic surgery to change my face and I will one day. What do I do with myself?? Its driving me crazy. I know genetically speaking if a deleterious allele exist in a family, it is more likely to be ped to the offspring if parents are of the same blood line, this is why is so wrong and stupid. I Truly want to slap the shyt out of their ignorant fat heads.